Don Edwards Literary Memorial

June 10, 2006

Beheading II


I’m very glad you are adverse to being personally heheaded. We are very much on the same page there.

Our culture likes hanging and sizzling, and more recently, apparently more humane, injection of some bad stuff. It is just too difficult to hang folks now without the impression created by slave days and “reconstruction” days, boy what a euphemism that is.

And electrocution could actually be pretty easy….take a couple of car battery cables, climb the power line and ssssssssssssssst. Much more sensible, especially in a high tech culture like ours. Anybody can lop off a head, but it takes expertise to electrocute a head of state. Pun intended.

I actually have a plan for the end of war as we know it. The UN, with the economic help of the United States, clears one thousand square miles of Antarctica. The UN defines the terms and rules of war. The two or more warring parties can go to a warehouse of war implements and weapons, no nuclears allowed, and no airplanes. There are limits, of course, equal numbers of soldiers….well paid and if they are injured, all expenses paid, if killed, a large stipend goes to their families etc.

There are internationally selected judges, umpires of a sort, striped shirts of course, who adjudicate infractions of the war rules and can impose fines or handicaps (no hand grenades for 30 days for example).

Winning and losing parameters would be well defined ground rules. Both countries have to put some disputed territory in “escrow.” The losing country cedes their escrow land to the winner. The winner gets that territory when the umpires judge the winner.

I probably haven’t thought this out completely, but the whole world could watch on television, thus fulfilling the blood lust needs of the general population of watchers, and the vast sums of “pay per view of war killings” could be distributed to the poor of the world.

I suspect I am either way smarter or way dumber than anyone knows.


Filed under: DON POSTS — Don @ 2:22 am

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